A Feminist Opinion on Splitting the Bill

Tonight after a political meeting some of us went for the optional but very necessary beer. It was a nice evening, just three of us (a woman in her early 40s and a [male] friend of mine who is about my age), some beer and nice discussions. The woman who waited our table was really nice and friendly and we never ran out of drinks. In the end when we wanted to leave we asked her for the bill and while the woman paid for herself the waitress immediately asked my friend if we were going to pay together.

First of all: No.

Secondly: Why did she assume that? Are two people of different sexes who are about teh same age immediately a couple? What kind of hetero-normative bullshit is this? Would she have asked this if I would have been sitting next to a girl? We are living in the 21st century, is it really that absurd that two people go for a drink (with another person!!) without being involved? Is there no such thing as friendship between a guy and a woman?

Thirdly: I don't let people pay for me, full stop. My boyfriend of 5 1/2 years doesn't pay for me either. I am an independant woman and I don't need someone to provide for me. So even if this guy would have been my boyfriend, why on earth would he pay for me? Do we still live in an era where women cannot provide for themselves? Where they are dependend on their lovers to pay? Where men have to earn enough to provide for another human being?

Sometimes I pay for both myself and my boyfriend. Sometimes he pays. In the end, it deoends on who has more money at them in that moment. It equalizes itself. But I do make sure he doesn't end up paying on a regular basis for the reasons I have mentioned before. It's important to me to be financially independant and thus I get mad when someone assumes that I don't provide for myself. I do not believe in these traditional gender roles. Which sounds like a disadvantage for menis nothing but open blantant sexism. Women are dependend, money is something associated with men. I do not blame the waitress, she was merely trying to be nice, after all she grew up in this society where men paying for women is the norm. Which is a bit ridiculous.

What do you think when it comes to this topic? Do you let other people pay for you/do you pay for your significant other?

Have a great day,
The Countess

A feminist Opinion on Wearing Head Scarves

I've been a feminist for as long as I can make conscious decisions. And now I think it's time to speak up. I don't want to hear another word about muslim women being less feminist than I. Or anybody else for that matter. 
I believe in equal rights. 
I believe in freedom of thought. 
And I believe in respect. 
What I don't believe in is bashing a religion or an opinion with the excuse of being feminist. 
 
I have been an atheist for as long as I can think and I personally am sick of hearing muslim women who decide to wear a head scarf/modest clothing/whatever are any less feminist than me.

I know what you might think:
A religion that tells women to cover up CAN'T be feminist. What you forget is that the women who wear head scarfs, niqabs or burqu DECIDE to do so and telling them they are less feminist by covering up makes you nothing but a hypocrite. Why? Because you take away their freedom of choosing their religion and their clothes which means you take away their right of making a decision in general. You don't own their body, they do! Feminism is the radical idea that women are people. And people have thoughts, they have opinions, they make decisions. They can do whatever they want. I decide to wear nothing but black, somebody else might decide to wear modest clothing and a head scarf. If you argue against them, you argue against me.

One of the nicest conversations I ever had about hair was with a friend who wears a head scarf (Yes, I'm talking to you, M.!). Not for a second did I have the feeling that her decision of covering up separated her from me. We talk about clothes, we talk about comics, we talk about feminism and everything else that comes to our mind. Because her wearing a head scarf is about as much of a problem as me not wearing one.

Another wonderful incident happend at a green youth meeting. It was one of my first big ones, I was really nervous and I didn't know anyone. I got in contact with a very nice girl wearing a head scarf and she complimented my (very short) black lace-y dress. She didn't judge me, she didn't force her opinion on me. Instead she made me feel accepted and welcome.
Now I ask you: When was the last time you complimented someone's head scarf?

Shouldn't we focus on what unites us instead of focusing on what makes us different? We all fight for the same cause: Equal rights for everyone. And that means the right to make a decision even if it isn't considered popular. So do whatever the fuck you want! Shave your head! Grow your hair out! Dye it blue or pink or black! Wear a head scarf! And finally: Be happy with yourself!

Have a great day,
The Countess

A Photoshoot

A few weeks ago I "modelled" for a project my friend Vivi had to do for her art and design school. I am by no means a model but she asked if I could help her and we have been taken photos together for years now so I happily agreed. Today she gave me the photos and I thought I'd share a few of them with you!


The first one is an supposed to be an idealized personal portrait. We wanted to use a picture where it seemed as if I was some sort of peaceful fighter for feminism and what came to mind as an inspiration this painting:

This is the result:

There are some other photos she took of me during these shootings and a few of them I really like:

Oh, also this happend:

Have a great day,
The Countess

History Nerd Facts

"The history of the world is but the biography of great men." -Thomas Carlyle.

This quote is often true but there have been some important, powerful women in the position as head of a country before Angela Merkel. Often, these women had to de-feminize themselfs in order to be taken seriously. Today I want to show you two very famous examples. They are not only a symbol of the repression of women by the patriachal society, not only victims. No, they are also proof that women can succeed in this world, can prove all the prejudiced people wrong. They used the fixed role systems for themselves, turned them around in order to fit to their use. These two women are very inspirational to me.

The first one is my favourite historical person of all times and also my idol:
Queen Elizabeth I., daughter of Henry VIII., sister of "Bloody" Mary I. and the first Queen of what we'd call Great Britain today. 

Queen Elizabeth is also known as the "Virgin" Queen, not because she really was a virgin but because she created this myth around her persona. She stylized herself as almost God-like, pure, above everything that is human. She did not do that because she liked being mythical but because it gave her the possibility to stay unmarried. People back in her time did not believe a woman could reign a country, they wanted her to get married as soon as possible so she could be replaced by her husband and become a wife and mother. It was regarded as unnatural to have a woman in a powerful, leading position, women were supposed to be mothers, wives, daughters, grandmothers but never leaders. 
There was one woman though, that everybody loved and hailed: 
The Virgin Mary.

So Queen Elizabeth decided to stylize herself like the Virgin Mary, She used white face paint, big wigs and impressive dresses to appear almost God-like to her people. They didn't see her as a woman anymore, they didn't see her as weak, as  unworthy, as imperfect. They saw her as this saint-like creature that was pure and perfect.
She went so far that she sometimes, when she referred to herself, she used the term "prince" or "king". If she could not be seen as the mythical virgin (for example when war was about to come up) she took the role of a man.


 "We princes are set as it were upon stages in the sight and view of the world."
 
  "I know I have the body but of a weak and feeble woman, but I have the heart and stomach of a king, and of a King of England too[...]"

This second quote is from her famous speech to the troops at Tilbury before the fight against the Spanish Armada. As the Virgin Queen, the saint, the pure perfection she couldn't lead her troops, so she showed them that she was indeed a King.

Queen Elizabeth's era is today known as The Golden Age. It's the time of Shakespeare and the time where Britain became the most powerful nation in the Western world. Queen Elizabeth supported the freedom of thought, especially when it came to religion, she is known to support the arts and she even has a US state named after her: Virginia.

Queen Christina of Sweden is the second woman I want to tell you about.
Her official title was "King". People addressed her as "queen" but her real title was the male one because usually the throne belonged to a man. Her nickname as a child was the "Girl King". Christina was brought up and educted as a boy because she was the only surviving child of her parents, the King and Queen of Sweden. She was Queen regent from he age of seven until she decided never to marry, converted to catholisism and gave away the crown to her (male) cousin. from that point on she was a Queen without a country. Most of the time she lived in Rome where she was a big supporter of the arts. Many people in her time have written about her not being exactly beautiful, she was probably what some people might call today a tomboy.

These two women can be role models for us, they show that women can succeed even in the worst times and even if they have to de-feminize themself. Elizabeth and Christina can also be reminders that equality is a long path. We are way better off than they are, no doubt, but we still haven't reached the goal. We are not allowed to use the limitations society puts on us as as exuses to lay back and stop trying. We have to follow our dreams, no matter what other people tell us to do.

Have a great day,
The Countess

Caitlin Moran Appreciation Post

Caitlin Moran is the author of the funny and inspiring feminist book "How To Be A Woman". She combines humour, autobiographic parts with her theories about sexism and how to overcome it. If you haven't read How To Be A Woman yet, you should! I read it this summer while traveling and caused quite some confusion on planes, busses and in the hostel because I couldn't stop laughing. I would have never thought that a book about feminism can be so unbelievably funny. I can agree with almost everything she says, we have a very similar view on feminism. Caitlin Moran's theories and comments are always spot on and simply amazingly written so I thought I'd do a little post to share some of my favourite quotes from the book with you:

“We need to reclaim the word 'feminism'. We need the word 'feminism' back real bad. When statistics come in saying that only 29% of American women would describe themselves as feminist - and only 42% of British women - I used to think, What do you think feminism IS, ladies? What part of 'liberation for women' is not for you? Is it freedom to vote? The right not to be owned by the man you marry? The campaign for equal pay? 'Vogue' by Madonna? Jeans? Did all that good shit GET ON YOUR NERVES? Or were you just DRUNK AT THE TIME OF THE SURVEY?” 


“I cannot understand anti-abortion arguments that centre on the sanctity of life. As a species we've fairly comprehensively demonstrated that we don't believe in the sanctity of life. The shrugging acceptance of war, famine, epidemic, pain and life-long poverty shows us that, whatever we tell ourselves, we've made only the most feeble of efforts to really treat human life as sacred.”  

"I realised that it’s technically impossible for a woman to argue against feminism. Without feminism, you wouldn’t be allowed to have a debate on women’s place in society. You’d be too busy giving birth on the kitchen floor - biting down on a wooden spoon, so as not to disturb the men’s card game - before going back to quick-liming the dunny. This is why those female columnists in the Daily Mail - giving daily wail against feminism - amuse me. They paid you £1,600 for that, dear, I think. And I bet it’s going in your bank account, and not your husband’s. The more women argue loudly, against feminism, the more they both prove it exists and that they enjoy its hard-won privileges.” 

 “What is feminism? Simply the belief that women should be as free as men, however nuts, dim, deluded, badly dressed, fat, receding, lazy and smug they might be. Are you a feminist? Hahaha. Of course you are.” 

“It's difficult to see the glass ceiling because it's made of glass. Virtually invisible. What we need is for more birds to fly above it and shit all over it, so we can see it properly.”

“For throughout history, you can read the stories of women who - against all the odds - got being a woman right, but ended up being compromised, unhappy, hobbled or ruined, because all around them, society was still wrong. Show a girl a pioneering hero - Sylvia Plath, Dorothy Parker, Frida Kahlo, Cleopatra, Boudicca, Joan of Arc - and you also, more often than not, show a girl a woman who was eventually crushed.” 

And finally:
 “Any action a woman engages in from a spirit of joy, and within a similarly safe and joyous environment, falls within the city-walls of feminism. A girl has a right to dance how she wants, when her favourite record comes on.” 

What do you think about those quotes? Are you interested in feminism? Have you read Caitlin Moran?
Have a great day,
The Countess

Pussy Riot sentenced to to years in jail

I am sad, I am shocked and I am disgusted! This is one of those moments where I have doubt that there is any good in people. The three members of the Russian punk group Pussy Riot have to go to jail for wo ears. 2(!) years. For a one minute long protest that did not hurt anyone or anything except for the huge egos of Putin and the Russion Orthodox Church. The (female) judge stated that they commited religious motivated hooliganism. Bullshit! They simply critized the influence the church has on the state and the close links between Putin and the church. 

Now, three young women will be seperated from their families and children. Russian jails are often hundreds of kilometres away from where the families live and the prisoners are only allowed very view visits during a year and only one phone call per month. Imagine being isolated from all your loved ones because you stood up for what is right!

Putin has again shown that he does not want a democracy where everyone can express their opinions but a dictatorship where his and the churches voices count alone. Sad but true.

If you want to read more about this, click!

Stuff that happend on the festival

Okay, so music festivals are fun, right? A huge crowd, dancing, clappinga nd sining to the same bands you like? That is like heaven! At least, that's the theory.

The reality often looks a little different. Especially for girls and women. So here are a few things that happend to me during the festival I went to last week:

• A drunk guy wanted to randomly hug me and didn't accept no for an answer. I seriously had to shout "I REALLY don't want you to touch me!!!!" more than ones. Of course, neither he or anybody else cared. So, there went my free will...
• While my friends and I were waiting for the next band to start plaxing, a young man came up to us and said "Come on, girls, smile for me!" We tried to ignore him because we were in the middkle of a conversation but he wasn't impressed by our reaction at all. He kept annoying us so we told him that we would rather not talk to him and that there are probably many people on this festival who would enjoy a conversation with him so he should go and find those. Again, we were ignored. He told us not to be so arrogant and whiney, he simply wanted to talk to us. Why do men often assume that because THEY want to talk to women those women HAVE TO bend to that men's will? I am a free human being and I can choose for myself with whom I want to interact. I am not there for somebody's entertainment.
• Some guys who had the tent next to ours urinated in the middle of the road in front of their cars and tents, ran around completely naked and once I even saw one of them jerk off where everyone could see him. It was disgusting. I didn't know what to do. If this would have happend in the city I would have gone to the police! Why do people think that they can let out their inner animals on festivals? 
• A guy spit on my head while passing by. Just because he could.

Don't get me wrong. Most people on that festival were perfectly nice and of course, the mucis was awesome so all in all I had a great time. It's just that small  percentage of (mainly) male idiots who decide that having the time of their lives means being sexist bastards. Unfortunately, these people can really take away the fun for the rest... To be honest, I'm not sure I'll be going again next year, even though I always went the last years.

Have you noticed this kind of things at festivals?

Have a great day,

The Countess

Judging a book by its cover

Hey, everyone, long time no post! I have just been to busy as I am out of uni until Octobre and I want to spend my free time with as many activities as possible. I have just come back from a festival called Taubertal and I am tired as fuck so I hope you will excuse this short post.

While I was at the festival some thinbgs I ordered from amazon arrived, including a book. So I thought I share with you the latest books I bought.

The first one is Rivers Of London by Ben Aaronovitch. I had already seen this one in a book store and loved the cover! It's a map of parts of London and it has those cute little skulls with hats at the upper part. On that particular day I had already bought a New Avengers comics so this baby had to stay in the store a little while longer. Finally, about two weeks ago, I found a gift coupon of my favourite book store in my closet ( should tidy up more often...) and instantly bought Rivers Of London. I haven't started reading it yet but it is supposed to be about a police constable who can see ghosts and who has to learn magic for a special task force that deals with supernatural cases. I am really excited to read this!!!!

The next book came with the amazon order and it is How To Be A Woman by Caitlin Moran. Again, look at the cover! The writing is silver and this and the whole cover has the Sltherin colours all over it. Amazing!!!

I haven't read it yet but as the title probably tells you it's about feminism, about being a woman in our society today and all the reviews I read so far suggest that it is really well written and extremly funny. I think I will read this during the next couple of days and Rivers Of London when I go on holidays.

The last one is finally one that i have already read. It is The Weed that Strings the Hangman's Bag by Alan Bradley and it is the second novel about the little hobby chemist and detective Flavia de Luce. The books play in England in the 1950s and deal with strange murder cases that happen around the little town where 11 year old Flavia lives. I enjoyed the first to books of the series alot and I definately plan to buy the next two ones, too!

Three things that make Flavia a totally awesome badass:

1. Her favourite things about chemistry are poisons. She reads everything about murder caes that involve some sort of poison and could probably kill the whole world without getting caught. She rather focuses on putting stuff in her sisters lipstick to cause allergic reactions, though. She has her own chemistry lab in the big old house where she lives with her father and her two older sisters and often "borrows" things from various family members in order to experiment with them. Such things include her sister's pearl necklace and her father's shaving knife.

2. She looks like friggin' Wednesday Addams!!!

3. Her personalitly is simply great: Even though she is only 11 years old and has to deal with the fact that her mother died when she was only a baby, Flavia has a really positive view on life. She isn't shocked easily at all, she is curious up to being annoying, she knows how to talk people into giving her information without being rude and she does everything to protect the people she cares about. Also, she does seem to have feministic tendencies.

Which books have you enjoyed in the past weeks? do you know any of the ones I mentioned?

Have a great day, 

The Countess

10 Reasons why we need feminism

- There are 188 directly elected political leaders in this world right now. 16 of them are women.

- Female circumcision

- The word 'feminist' is still used as an insult.

- Less money for the same work

- The idea that women HAVE TO shave.

-The looks a woman still gets when she says that she doesn't like and/or doesn't want kids.

- The threats and harassments Anita Sarkeesian gets because she announced that she wants to talk about how women are portraited in video games. She gets threats that include her being raped, beaten up and killed.

-Gay women still have to fight against the stereotype that they are less of a woman than a straight woman.

- The Pro Life movement

- The feminist movement often got and gets involved in other important movements such as the anti- slavery movements back in the past, the LGBT movement etc.

I leave you with this: It's a really good video about how female characters in comics etc. are often randomly killed in order to support the development of a male character.

Are you a feminist?

Why do you think feminism is important?

Have a great day,

The Countess